Larry the Tree

We had a tree growing in our front yard right next to our driveway. Yes: had. The tree was dying for a long time and we had been getting rainstorms and windstorms. We didn’t want to take the chance of the tree falling on our house, or worse, falling down on a child.

We called a tree company to take care of the tree, who was suddenly “Larry” and a beloved member of our family according to The Oppressed. She vehemently protested the decision to, “murder Larry”. The execution was carried out on Earth Day of all days.

The oppressed protested. She was furious. Trees give us oxygen to breathe. We’re killing the Earth and its inhabitants if we take this tree down. I explain to her a tree is not giving oxygen if there are no leaves (needles) on it. The tree is already dead. All this is fruitless against a nine-year-old expert on trees and ecology. We don’t care about the environment. There is a mark on the cruel, heartless men who have killed Larry. Wife and I, who are paying these men, are just as culpable.

The deed was done. Larry was cut down, ground up, and taken away. The stump was all that was left of Larry. The tree workers were coming back to grind the stump. The Oppressed wasted no time in constructing a memorial for Larry to remind the neighborhood and the murderous tree workers of what had once occupied the spot on our front yard.

Larry’s memorial. The sign reads, “Here lies Larry the Tree X(“

There is a positive to this story. The Boy asked the tree workers if they could put another tree in Larry’s place. When the workers returned to grind the stump. They left a Japanese Maple tree. The Miracles of Christ were overjoyed to see it.

Faith restored

Published by bravedaddy

I am a househusband and stay-at-home parent. I offer this sanctuary to any parent, new or otherwise, to let them know they are not alone in their daily struggles and challenges to their sanity.

2 thoughts on “Larry the Tree

  1. Well, did you plant another tree to replace it? When I was about her age, I planted (all by myself) the maple tree that was out front, by the driveway on Curran Road. I remember when it was just a little stick, that when it would snow, I would dig Out all the snow around it. But wait, when the snowplows came, then it was really a challenge, but I started all over again and I did save the tree. Now fast forward, twenty years later, every Fall I would look up at that TREE, asking myself, how in gods name can it have so many leaves 🍁🍂🍁🍂 and I just continued raking and bagging.

    Like

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